Browse by Tags
Sorry, but there are no more tags available to filter with.
-
-
Thought I would throw a Hillary Clinton joke in today... A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. He asked, "What are all those clocks?" St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move." "Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?" "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie." "Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?" St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life." "Where's Hillary's clock?" asked the man. Hillary's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."
-
-
American Kids: Move out when they're 18 with the full support of their parents **Italian Kids: Move out when they're 28, having saved for that nice house and are a week away from getting married .... unless there's room in the basement for the newlyweds. **American Kids: When their Mom visits them she brings a nice bundt cake and you sip coffee and chat. ** Italian Kids: When their Mom visits them she brings 3 days worth of food and begins to immediately tidy up, dust, do the laundry or rearrange the furniture. **American Kids: Their dads always call before they come over to visit them and its usually only on special occasions. **Italian Kids: Are not at all fazed when their dads come over, unannounced, on a Saturday morning at 8:00 and starts pruning the fruit trees. And if there are no fruit trees, he will plant some! **American Parents: You can leave your kids with them and you always worry if everything is going to be ok plus you have to feed them after you pick them up...
-
-
Since the summer season is literally right around the corner, I thought I would like to insite you on BBQing After four long months of cold and winter, we are finally coming up to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking, as it's the only type of cooking a real man will do, probably because there is some of danger involved. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events are put into motion: 1) The woman buys the food. 2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert. 3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand. Here comes the important part: 4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL. 5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery. 6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and...
-
-
I know a lot of adults who read the blogs here on Steeple Media, and there are some "younger aged" "kids" too... Hopefully those of you who are sending your kids to summer camp this summer dont get this letter and hopefully those younger ones who are going to camp dont send this letter. Sorry for this scoutmom! Dear Mom & Dad, Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are okay. Only one of our tents and twosleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned becausewe were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when it happened. Ohyes, please call Adam's mother and tell her he is okay. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps.It was neat. We never would have found Adam in the dark if it hadn'tbeen for the lightning. Scoutmaster Keith got mad at Adam for going on ahike alone without telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn...
-
-
A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not shown up for work and had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper. " Hello ? " "Is your daddy home?" he asked. " Yes ," whispered the small voice. May I talk with him?" The child whispered, " No ." Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your Mommy there?" " Yes ." "May I talk with her?" Again the small voice whispered, " No ." Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, "Is anybody else there?" " Yes ," whispered the child, " a policeman ". Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?" " No, he's busy ", whispered the child. "Busy doing what?" " Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ," came the whispered answer. Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background...
-
-
How to Get Out of a Traffic Ticket With a Bottle of Water Difficulty: Moderately Challenging This is a great way to get out of a ticket if you can pull it off. Things You'll Need Bottle of water, and good acting skills! Instructions Step 1: All ways keep a bottle of water within reach in your car. Step 2: If you just got pulled over for running a red light or speeding, pull over in public area and under a light if at night, while the police officer is pulling the car over take the bottle and pour some on your lap as if you had an 'accident'. Step 3: Once the officer comes to the window calmly tell him or her -in your own words- that you had a terrible personal accident, give them all necessary paper work and ask to PLEASE let you go this time because the only reason you were in a hurry was to get home and change out of your very wet and uncomfortable soiled pants! Step 4: With Karma on your side (always follow the golden rule for this) you will be let go out of pity from an understanding...
-
-
Even though there isnt going to be a real dish until Monday, I found this article from wikihow.com would be very useful to some parents out there. I also wanted to point out that you can now add the Dish to your Google, AOL, Yahoo and MSN pages by clicking on the button at the end of the article. <!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--> <!--[endif]--> How to Raise Children to Be Rich Many of the skills and attitudes needed to become rich begin to develop in childhood. If you want your child to grow up to become the next Bill Gates or Warren Buffett, or if you just want to encourage the development of habits that will help your child become more responsible with money, start early and be a good example. Steps Examine your beliefs and feelings about money. Do you believe that money is a good thing that can help you achieve your dreams and have fun, or do you see it first and foremost at “the root of all evil”? If your thoughts tend toward the latter, you’ll have a hard time convincing...